Every previous negative experience may cause misgivings about new potential relationships, simply because you want to do it right this time, but don’t know how. All you can think of is what if you don’t make a good match, what if you’re going to be disappointed again, what if his parents don’t like you, and your list of fears goes on and on.
By asking yourself all these questions you make things too complicated, and these worries actually may harm the healthy development of a new relationship.
Take a deep breath. If you have just met a nice man, there are some things you need to clarify for yourself before jumping into a new relationship.
You need to start with making sure that you are honest with yourself. No woman should change for the sake of a man, no matter how charming he is.
1. Your past relationships don’t determine your future
Whatever happened to you in the past doesn’t mean that it will happen again. Your ex partner may have cheated on you, but this doesn’t mean that your new potential partner will do the same. You need to understand that they are two different people with different characters and behaviors. Think of your new relationship as if it were a fresh, clean page.
2. Always maintain your independence
A relationship shouldn’t be your only source of your happiness. Put yourself in the first place, and enjoy what you like to do: read, ride a bike, do yoga, or anything that makes you feel independent and happy. Yes, a relationship means that you put the other person’s interest ahead of yours, but sometimes you have the right to be a little self-centered. Never forget what makes you happy, and be self-centered for yourself and altruistic for your other half.
3. Keep in mind that being alone is not a punishment
Being alone doesn’t mean that something is not right with you. Sometimes it’s better to be alone then staying with someone who makes you unhappy. When you start a new relationship, nothing is guaranteed. However, if you don’t feel anything for that person, it’s not worth continuing, and it’s not fair neither for the other person, nor for you. Don’t worry if you need to stay alone for a while.
4. Don’t fret about insignificant things
if you concentrate on the small habits of your partner that bother you, you will never be able to establish a deeper relationship. All of us have small quirks and habits that someone else won’t like. But if these make you furious, the problem is your attitude. Be generous and pay attention to more significant things.
5. Love yourself
If you don’t love, respect and appreciate yourself, there are high chances that a man will treat you the the same, and he won’t appreciate and respect you.
You need to love yourself, know your own worth and what you deserve, and never settle for less. All these mean that before starting a new relationship you need to allow some time to come to terms with yourself.