All of us have a few habits that don’t exactly contribute to our peace and calm. The longer one is practicing a bad habit, the more one becomes the slave of it – to the point of a complete idenfification with the habit. At that point, a person only shrugs when receiving criticism, perhaps also adding “this is just the way I am”.
Many impressions, including images, smells, sounds and feelings have a strong effect on the human mind, but there is one emotion that has an especially strong effect on the human psyche, and this is fear. Fear is what causes people develop habits that might be completely alien to their nature first, but keep growing on them over time. But the good news is, our habits, just like our mind, can be developed purposefully. We can exclude everything from our lives that pull us back and prevent us from just being our true, happy selves.
Below, we are sharing a list of eight behaviors that we find the most important to get rid of ASAP.
1. Complaining – one of the most common habits, and a tell-tale sign that one chooses to find fault in others instead of assuming responsibilities and taking actions. If you complain a lot, you become the victim of circumstances. The solution is to collect yourself and become active in shaping those circumstances that are in your favor.
2. Gossiping – what does this habit mean to you? Why do you gossip? Is it perhaps so you distract attention from yourself? The solution is to focus on objective information instead of giving vent to what you suppose is true about others. Also, if someone gets in trouble, show compassion instead of spreading the bad news.
3. Postponing chores – this habit always leads to intense anxiety. If you are aware that a task must be done, but you haven’t started on it yet, you had better get going right away. Simply take a deep breath and do what you have to!
4. Work, work, and more work – even if you imagine that your work is the most important thing in the world, you need to rest from time to time. Obviously, your profession is part of your life, but you shouldn’t be afrad that your existence will be meaningless as soon as you stop working. Discover the taoist in you, and try to answer the following question: “At the end of my life, what is it that I will regret more: the fact that I didn’t work enough, or that I didn’t spend enough time with my loved ones?” The solution: take it easier. Have a day off each week, and spend it with your family.
5. Unnecessary expenses – probably this point doesn’t need too much explanation. We spend most of our time buying things, or earning money for things, which may boost our pride, but aren’t good for much else. Never forget that your personality is complete without any kinds of accessories. The solution: accept the fact that it’s not your possessions that will determine who you are.
6. Worrying about what others think of you – this may surprise you, but most of the time no one thinks anything about you. Don’t take this wrong: people are simply preoccupied with what others may think about them. Whatever you feel that others think about you, in fact reflects your opinion about yourself.
7. Being a perfecionist and lacking confidence – living under the spell of perfectionism means living in constant fear. If you are a maximalist, you are almost constantly struggling with trying to fix everybody and everything. If you are always looking for faults, and then you fix them and start a new quest to find more faults, you eventually become trapped in an unnecessary, even destructive vicious circle. If you always search for imperfections, your mind starts indentifying with negative things. The solution: try to concentrate on positive things. Not everything has to be, or can be made perfect!
8. Torturing yourself about the past and worrying about the future – these are probably the most cunning habits. If you are a victim of them, you are constantly tormented by fear. You become permanently afraid that you will repeat your past mistakes in the future. If you agonize between the past and the present, you will never be able to live fully in the present; however, everything you have is manifested only in the present moment. How would you like to spent your present? The solution: consider your past mistakes wise teachers, which made it possible for you to make smart decisions now.